5 Summer Self Improvement Tips For Single Ladies

Being single couldn’t feel worse right about now. We’re heading straight into Couple-Season where the happily-attached seem to flaunt their abundance of love and joy on every park bench and around every corner. It’s a single girl’s nightmare, but what makes it worse is when it shows on your face.

Courtesy of AmandaLouise

I remember those feelings of dread before I met my own Prince Charming – the beach parties and the barbeques. Even worse – the wedding RSVP addressed to Heidi Lee with an empty space where my +1 should have been. But eventually I learned that those anxiety-packed events were actually opportunities to improve myself.

Now, now dear ones, I know – having a date for Cousin Alice’s wedding is more exciting then some stinking self-improvement ritual. But what if I were to tell you that a few fun self-improvement tactics will get you more summer dates? It’s sort of a bonus idea.

Remember, when you feel good and show confidence, you become more attractive – period. You’ll be amazed how many new people you will meet as a single at a friend’s barbeque simply by wearing a new shade of self-confidence. 

For my gentlemen readers – here is the point where you click away for Fantasy Stats – these tips are for ladies only …

5 Easy Summer Self-Improvement Tips For Single Ladies

  1. Get fitted: This is first tip on the list for a reason, girls. Our bodies change, and our bra size ad style from 3 years ago may not work as well with our new figure. Up a size or down – either way a properly fitted bra makes you look slimmer with the curves in the right place. Most of the Intimate stores will do the fitting free of charge, and the sales ladies are well trained on the styles for your body type. Same rules apply for your tank-inis too.
  2. Gloss up: Nothing like a perfectly tinted lip gloss with a hint of plumping action to help you feel a tad saucy. My personal favorite – Buxom Amber seems to fit almost any occasion.
  3. Get moving: Walk, jog, run – it really doesn’t matter. Being outdoors replenishes the VItamin D and freshens your skin. Double-duty tip because the exercise tightens your thighs and bum :) Just remember to wear the proper UV Protection for your skin type.
  4. Smarten up: Enroll in a summer class or workshop. Have you always wanted to learn tennis? What about painting? Hubby and I are heading to Chicago this summer for a Wine & Canvas class. Why not grab a couple of your single gal pals and  think of your own outing? At the very least, the experience will give you an interesting conversation topic for summer dates. Best case scenario – your future Prince Charming just happened to ignore my above request that men don’t read on, and he shows up in the same class asking to be the hot chick’s study partner (that’s you, by the way ;)
  5. Go naked: Oh behave – I mean naked with your foods. Check out the colors at your local farmers markets and stock your fridge with crisp fruits and veggies. Eating fresh, naked produce not only gives you an energy boost, it adds a little color to your cheeks.

There you have it, my innocent lovelies. Not only will you survive another singles-summer, you will thrive. It’s all about attitude, ladies. When you feel good about yourself, you are in a better position to meet the man of your dreams.  And trust me – he is looking for you right now as well. So get that sourpuss face out of his way and make yourself shine this summer.

And drop back by here to let me know when you meet him. I do RSVP to wedding invites :)

Please feel free to share any tips or tricks that work for you below in the comments.

xoxo,

Heidi Lee

 

 

Top 10 Online Dating Questions To Learn His Secrets Faster

Great work, ladies! You’re online dating and you’ve met Mr. Full of Possibilities through an Online Dating Site. But guess what, sweetheart? You’re eventually going to get to the dreaded Q&A session that inevitably comes from wanting to know more about Mr. Maybe The One.

Just so happens that Heidi Lee thought you may be struggling with this topic, so she reached within the Toad Kingdom and asked for my advice.

I’m Eric, and as hopefully a Frog rather than a Toad, I’m thrilled to be able to share a few pointers to help you in your journey.

First and most importantly – you don’t want questions too personal, too hard, too desperate, or how shall I say this? … well, too blunt.

However, you would also like to know what the guy is about, so you can cut him short if he’s a dud.

Be honest, ladies. How many guys have you asked about their favorite band? Dull!

More boring yet …”What do you do for a living?” Statistics show that men grow tired of answering the same-old questions on the first date, and they especially don’t like to be put into a corner about their careers.

Gals, you’re in luck. It just so happens that I AM one of those guys you might want to meet, and I’m here to share a few secrets with you.

The 10 Best Online Dating Questions To Learn His Secrets Faster

1.    What about me first caught your attention? This is a straight-forward question that will give the sincere/good guy the opportunity to shimmer in the sunlight, and the insincere/bad ones the invitation to bumble through their pre-written answers, and end up looking like a jerk. Make sure that you are talking to a real guy who has time to answer you.

2.    What is something that most women don’t understand about men? This will give you a hint, as to any past problems he’s had in relationships, as well as any unrealistic expectations or demands he tends to place on women. Let him tell you his insecurities, before finding them out yourself.

3.    What is the most exciting purchase you made this year? Mine was… Fights about finance area big deal breaker in all relationships. If you have a certain style of saving or spending money, it is probably a good idea to make sure that a guy can hang with that. Frugal partners don’t get along with spendthrifts, and vice versa. To throw him off, answer the question, before awaiting his turn.

4.    What does it take to achieve a good relationship? In other words, what are his values, goals, and interests in maintaining a close, intimate relationship? This question will also give you a hint as to his level of maturity, and what you could probably expect from a long-term relationship with him.

5.    If a relationship does not work out for you, how do you usually end it? This will tell you how much he is willing to invest in a partnership. Guys who are in it just for fun, don’t think about ending a relationship, as they have no plan of getting into one in the first place.

6.    What was your most embarrassing moment? Studies show that humor is essential in every relationship. You don’t have to be a comedian. However, it is important that you can at least laugh at yourself when the moment calls for it.

7.    What do you think is the best thing about being single? In other words, how ready is he to get off the market? It’s great to be content in bachelorhood. However, if he gushes over his lifestyle too much, he may not be willing to give it up. Just beware of this before investing any significant time.

8.    What is your idea of the perfect first date? Few questions can really get to the heart of romance within a guy more than this one. If you’re wondering if he is a ‘flowers and candlelight’ type of guy, or a ‘take you back to his apartment’ after the second drink? This is where you’ll get the first hint.

9.    Does your family live nearby? How often do you get to see them? Some partners are the family- type, and others are not. However, rarely will the two fit together in harmony, unless they both have similar ideas about what a family is. If you love your family, and want your partner to love them too; make sure he is a ‘family guy’.

10.  Can we swap tomorrow’s date for a different day? Easy going guys are the best type to have, especially for the women with kids (or planning to have them someday). It is important to know that a guy can roll with the punches, or in this case, that he can roll with a change of plans, which is frequently necessary when you have more than just two people to satisfy.

Try the questions out when you’re dreading the Q&A rounds with your would-be Prince Charmings. I can tell you for certain that a lady with interesting questions certainly catches my eye.

Happy Dating!

Online Dating For Authors Poets & Artists

Online Dating creativity surrounded me this weekend while I was at a Writers’ Conference in the North Woods of Wisconsin. As I read from my Online Dating memoir, it seemed that every person in the room either was Online Dating, had successfully met someone through Online Dating, or had a close friend who is already – or - should be Online Dating.

Of approximately 100 writers attending the conference - each person I met had an Online Dating story. With these stories came questions – of course! Who else might they ask other than the new lady who just read a revealing confession from her Online Dating memoir?

We spoke of dating profiles, horror stories, hopes, romance … And then I introduced the authors to my very own Prince Charming (PC for short). The more we spoke, the more I learned from each of them, including how lucky I am to have such a loving hubby. And the more they wanted to know how I hooked PC.

The more I listened, the more I realized that – Online Dating Is For Artists!

Why is that, Heidi Lee? Can’t everyone benefit from the wealth of available singles in the Toad Kingdom? Is it really an exclusive club limited to the artistically inclined? I’ve never picked up a paintbrush in my life! Now you tell me if I can’t paint I can’t date?

I’m done, Heidi Lee! Seriously!!!

Ah, but there is more, Young Grasshopper … or should I contextually translate to Young Tadpole?

Think about this. Have you ever complimented someone on their weight loss? Perhaps on a smile or a witty remark? Those compliments are an artistic expression. Use that art introspectively to create your self-portrait.

Are you skilled in the joy of telling jokes? Share a punch line from your favorite joke … but don’t share the set-up.

Do you have a passion for reading or writing? If so – who are your favorite authors and why?

How about music? In Chapter 9 of my editing process, I came across the profile where Carlos stated that the music of Ennio Morricone brings tears to his eyes.

This weekend I listened to poets, short story writers, novelists – all telling stories of finding beauty in the ordinary. They spoke of finding the beauty hiding within themselves.

They spoke of art.

Now let’s bring my revalation full circle.

There is an art to giving a compliment or telling a story. Poetry is found when you see a falling leaf during an autumn walk. And beauty is all around when friends are together laughing.

That is how an Author, Poet or other Artist finds his or her inspiration. That is how I shared with my writing community how to write an Online Dating Profile.

This would be my same advice for you, my dear ones. If you are writing to find your own Prince Charming, share the Art in you.

If you love books, don’t just say, “I enjoy reading.” Rather, share your favorite author and why you love his or her writing.

Dinner and dancing more your thing? Perhaps mention your clumsy attempt at learning the Rhumba but a willingness to still step on his feet if only he sends a wink …

When you write your Online Dating Profile, find the art inside of you. Share a glimpse. Become interesting.

Keep in mind that the Toad Kingdom has over 20,000 new members joining daily. That’s some pretty stiff competition. So if you can paint a more interesting self-portrait, you will stand out above the other 20k.

What other types of artistic expression have you written about in yourself? Has anything worked better? Maybe its cooking or gardening. Let’s hear from you, sweet ones …

Questions? Just ask …

Loving Regards,

Heidi Lee

May Toad Of The Month

Spring is in full bloom in the Toad Kingdom of Online Dating which means that Toads are dangerously multiplying and seeking potential hosts to victimize. Head my warning – this month’s vile little creature is one of the most dangerous varieties …

Ladies, Beware!

Species Name: Toadus Bloatus Beer-Guttus

  • Common Name: Dud
  • Species Description: Camouflaged with primal charm and sincerity, this Toad’s receding hairline and lack of moral fiber are hidden by strategic comb-overs. He manages to hide his lack of depth behind a protruding belly and pretends men win by not only having the most toys but the biggest guts this side of Mt. Everest.
  • Mating Calls: Raw humor and a boisterous laugh, Bloatus makes calls like “Nice rack, Babe!” or ”How about a body shot?” sound endearing to unsuspecting hosts. The bullish croaks cause giggling and blushing in susceptible prey, and Bloatus is able to seal the deal with ”Winner buys the next round!” The mating call devolves upon deeper infestation when Bloatus’s croak morphs into a bellowing belch. A beer stench lingers in the air, and he is too busy looking at Internet Porn to excuse himself.
  • Habitat and Distribution: Researchers have found varieties of Bloatus Beer-Guttus in pool halls, truck stops, chat rooms, with countless clusters lurking in porn sites disguised as free online dating sites. Finding a partner/host is a secondary goal; this Toad prefers tawdry sex without the “C” word of any kind: commitment, compassion, cunnilingus.
  • Distinguishing Characteristics: Earthy, haven’t-bathed-for-a-week scent mingled with undertones of stale ale and cheap tobacco. Other Toad varieties struggle to understand how Bloatus seems to attract potential victims, yet his unexpected success is really about his Beer-Guggus-ness: There is something completely non-threatening about this type of Toad. In fact, from certain angles he looks more like a pincushion than a man, thus rendering him a rather harmless choice.
  • Symptoms of Infestation:  Bloatus ingratiates himself quickly with a willing host – his victim unaware of the danger of entertaining the novelty of this species. Infestation occurs in the host’s external environment rather than the internal immune system. She realizes the menace from the trail of beer cans that Bloatus uses as ashtrays – and the pull-my-finger humor becomes the most intelligent household conversation. Feelings of deep humilation and anger replace her initial adoration as Bloatus burrows himself more deeply. She devotes research to discover if the Internet Porn Computer Virus is more hazardous than the potential salmonella left from the Toad’s lack of attention to hygeine.  If left untreated, infestation may require a team of professional exterminators to rid the environment not only of Bloatus, but also his flatulent Knot of Toads* who replace the host’s dining room furniture with folding card tables and lawn chairs.

*A group of Toads is referred to as a Knot where as a group of Frogs is known as a Colony … interesting that Toads are tangled messes but frogs become a community

Meet the other Toads …

Enjoy the first chapter of my upcoming memoir, The Art of Toad Kissing, to learn about how I kissed the toads so you won’t have to.